When dealing with the fairer sex, there are several phrases or words you’d like to avoid hearing in the course of your interaction. Consider this a dictionary or thesaurus that will help you understand better what she is saying. More important, you’ll better understand how to retort (or not) when she utters one of the following words or phrases:

1. “Whatever”

This word is number one for a reason. It is the single greatest word at a woman’s disposal during a verbal confrontation with you. What does “Whatever” really mean? Scholars maintain that the original translation was lost somewhere in ancient Mesopotamia – perhaps when man first learned he would never win an argument with a woman when she ended it with the first “whatever” and walked off. But what does it mean today? Please note the following list of what “whatever” may mean depending on the scenario:

  • “I’m done with this conversation” – (loosely translated to mean): Your stupidity in this moment annoys me and you should stop talking now. Followed by her saying nothing else.
  • “You’re not my father” – (loosely translated to mean): I am an adult or you don’t tell me what to do or I can take of myself or I don’t need you. This is usually followed by her going to do what you told her not to do.
  • “You have no idea what you’re talking about” – (loosely translated to mean): How stupid are you really? Do you really know how stupid you sound right now? This is usually followed by a blank stare with her eyes piercing right through your skin.
  • “You really get on my nerves” –(loosely translated to mean): You really get on my nerves
  • “I really have nothing else to say at this moment because what you just said to me was actually correct and I know I’m wrong but I’m not ready to admit that I was wrong so I’ll simply say the first thing that comes to my mind” –(loosely translated to mean): You are right, I am wrong. Whatever.

2. “Fine”

Close to “Whatever”, “Fine” is almost as strong as “Whatever” but not quite. “Fine” is not as ambiguous as “Whatever”. When she says “Fine”, don’t be fooled. She is far from “Fine”. She is not “Fine”. She is probably pissed – most likely at you, something you said, something you did, something you didn’t do or something you want to do that she doesn’t want you to do. Notice the common denominator in the previous line – it’s you. “Fine” is usually followed by the silent treatment (which you might think is a good thing – but it’s really not. The silent treatment is a temporary reprieve from her verbal anger. It also means she’s thinking. Not a good thing.) The only thing worse than the silent treatment is if she says “Fine” followed by an immediate “Whatever” (i.e. “Fine Whatever”)

3.“You just don’t understand”

Be careful when she says this one. She knows you don’t understand – you are not a woman. She doesn’t expect you to understand. She says “You just don’t understand“ to you primarily for two reasons. One, she wants you to know that she thinks you don’t understand. That’s fine. You can live with that. Two, she says it in an attempt to stump you with the old “transference of emotion” play. It’s a spitball that you have no chance to hit. She knows it when she throws “You just don’t understand” your way.

4. Any compliment that starts with “My Ex”

You don’t want to hear anything nice about her ex. As a matter of fact, you don’t want to hear anything about her ex – nice or not. In your mind, you are her first, her last and her everything. The thought of her ex doing something better for her than you is Chinese arithmetic. You don’t want to be compared to him. You don’t like him. You also don’t want hear that she is comparing you to him in her mind or that she is thinking about him. How do you respond? Don’t. Just nod in acknowledgment.

5. Any sentence that starts with “You need to…”

This probably means you’re getting ready to be criticized on some level. You have a job. She thinks you don’t make enough money or you can do better. “You need to…” She doesn’t like your friends. She thinks they are a bad influence on you. “You need to…” You spend too much money on wasteful stuff or you don’t save enough. “You need to…” When she says  “You need to…”, generally it comes because she’s been thinking about it for some time or something set her off. Either way, get ready for some criticism because it’s probably coming.

To Be Continued

People who strive to change the world don't take the high road; they build it - @MaxwellWStyles