Charlie Foster

The world, particularly America has become quite lazy. More and more people are expecting things to be done for them and not actually working to earn anything. One of the main problems is that most people don’t learn or discover anything for themselves at all anymore. The generation of the entitled is taking over and people are becoming slaves to tutorials, technology and social media. This weekend I met a woman who had a very similar thinking pattern to mine. Of course I thought this was weird, especially when I brought up topics like death, stupidity and other things that women don’t usually like to talk about. This conversation led me into ways of solving the different small problems that were taking place during the weekend. Most of these would seem very small to most people but me, well I’m a bit different when it come to these things. I decided to come up with simple solutions to some of the most basic problems and share them with the audience.

Situational Awareness

The particular situation I am referring to is that of walking and texting. All day I see people walking around with their heads down in the phone. Not paying attention to where they are going and then being surprised when they bump into someone or something. Even better, they decide to stop in the middle of a walkway or busy street to give undivided attention to a message and make everyone else go around them or hold up walking traffic.


A system of cameras and street sensors would be installed that could track whether or not you were paying attention to your direction of travel. As soon as this lack of attention was detected and related to your own personal reasons, a hole would open up in the ground and you would fall straight down. I’m unsure exactly how far this would make an impact, but it would definitely start making people pay attention and put the devices down for a few seconds while traveling.


Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about reading instructions. If I need to know something, I will do the research and find out. The problem all started back when a woman sued McDonalds for giving her hot coffee. Which she spilled on herself and claimed that she wasn’t aware it was hot. She was paid. Yes, she actually was paid a settlement.


If I were President, I would take the labels off of everything and let nature take it’s course. If you are too dumb to not understand you shouldn’t be drinking bleach or that the hot meal you ordered is actually still hot when you get it, you deserve everything you get.


There are far to many people in America raising kids without the slightest idea of how to do so. Manners, proper public behavior, and the importance of education are all taking a backseat to social media, reality TV, and other nonsense. The people that shouldn’t have kids are pumping them out at an alarming rate, and expecting the government to support them. The people that would be excellent parents and focus on the important things just keep waiting until it’s to late. This is a similar scenario from Idiocracy. The problem is the fictional story is becoming closer and closer to becoming a reality and there is only one way to stop it from coming to fruition.


There should be a test that determines whether or not you should be a parent. With all these mind doctors, one of them should be able to figure this out and surmise the proper dynamics and the way of thinking that makes a good parent. Upon passing this test you will be granted a license, the same way you have to apply for a marriage or drivers license. Those who fail the test and decide to have kids anyway will be fined, have their child placed with a qualified family who can’t have kids, and also have the “procedures” done. By procedures I mean tubes tied and sperm rendered ineffective.

Batman stole all his stuff from me. I could totally beat up Liam Neeson.